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Dr B R Aruna Reddy published in Articles, Blogs

The Life of Future Kids: A Glimpse into the Changing Times

As parents, we often find ourselves asking questions that seem to echo through the corridors of time:

Where is the time going?

Why are our children so busy yet not productive?

What is it that’s keeping them occupied all day?

When will they become responsible and independent?

These are the concerns that shape our parenting choices, as we try to ensure our children grow up to be successful, balanced, and content individuals.

But, when I take a moment to reflect on my own childhood, the questions become even more profound. Was I too busy back then? I remember a time when my day was filled with simple joys—playing outside with friends, spending time with family, learning new skills, and simply being in the moment. Time seemed abundant, and life was a balanced blend of studies, hobbies, and relationships. I would gaze at the stars, try to locate constellations, and engage in endless conversations with loved ones.

The Simplicity of the Past vs. the Frenzied Present
In contrast, today’s kids seem to be caught in an endless cycle of commitments—online courses, offline classes, sports, hobbies, social media, and the constant pressure to excel in everything they do. As parents, we push our children to take part in every activity that promises to enhance their future, from life skills training to tennis lessons, and summer camps to coding classes. But as we enroll them in these programs, I can’t help but wonder: Did we need all these structured courses when we were growing up?

Life skills, problem-solving, creativity—these weren’t things we learned from a textbook or from an expert. We picked them up naturally through experiences, challenges, and simply interacting with our surroundings. We didn’t need to attend a specialized workshop to figure out how to manage our time or resolve a conflict. These skills developed through the very act of living life.

So, what does this mean for the future of our children? Are we inadvertently pushing them into a future that values productivity over peace, achievement over joy? Perhaps it’s time to rethink how we approach parenting in this modern age. Instead of constantly pushing our children toward the next course or the next milestone, maybe we need to encourage them to slow down, enjoy the present, and find fulfillment in the things that truly matter—relationships, personal growth, and emotional well-being.

As parents, it’s our responsibility to guide our children toward success. But success isn’t just about acing a test or winning a competition. It’s about finding contentment, creating lasting connections, and discovering the simple joys that life offers.
In the end, maybe the greatest life skill we can teach our children is how to truly live—to embrace life as it comes, with all its ups and downs, and to cherish the moments that often go unnoticed in the rush toward the future.

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Pooja Kansal published in Blogs

Mom’s guilt

Becoming a mom changes everything, but one of the most empowering things a mom can do is gain financial independence. It’s not just about making money—it’s about having the freedom to make decisions for yourself and your family without relying on anyone else.

In the journey from “Mom to Ma’am,” financial independence is like a key that unlocks a whole new world. It allows you to balance both being a mom and following your own dreams and goals. It’s about creating a life where you don’t have to choose between taking care of your kids and achieving your own personal success.

Taking Control of Your Life

When you’re financially independent, you have the power to make choices that are right for you and your family. Instead of depending on someone else for your financial security, you’re in charge of your own future. You can decide what career path you want to take, whether you want to start a business, or even just what’s best for your family in the long run. Financial independence means freedom. It means not having to ask for permission to follow your passions or make big life decisions.

One of the hardest things moms deal with is mom guilt. Whether it’s guilt about working too much or not spending enough time with the kids, it’s always there. But when you’re financially independent, you can learn to let go of that guilt. You’re not just doing it for yourself—you’re doing it for your family too. Showing your kids that you can balance both career and family teaches them important lessons about work, responsibility, and passion.

Financial independence for moms isn’t just about having more money; it’s about freedom. It’s about being able to make decisions that serve you and your family’s future. When a mom becomes financially independent, she gains confidence, control, and the ability to chase her own dreams while still being the loving, dedicated mom she always was.

So, as you go through your own journey from “Mom to Ma’am,” remember that you don’t have to choose between being an amazing mom and achieving your personal goals. You can do both—and financial independence is the key to unlocking that power.

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Pooja Kansal published in Blogs

The Power of Motherhood: How It Changes Us

The Power of Motherhood: How It Changes Us

Motherhood is a huge life shift. It’s not just about caring for a child—it’s about how becoming a mom transforms us from the inside. The moment we step into the role of “mom,” everything changes, and not just in our daily routines. It changes who we are, how we see ourselves, and what we believe we’re capable of.

The Moment Everything Shifts

When you become a mom, it feels like a switch flips. One minute, you’re just you. The next, you’re responsible for another person. Whether it’s the first time you hold your baby or the first sleepless night, that moment hits you hard. And while it’s overwhelming, it’s also the start of discovering a new side of yourself. You might find yourself feeling more patient, more protective, and sometimes even stronger than you ever knew you could be.

Reclaiming Your Identity as a Mom

The transition to motherhood often makes us feel like we’ve lost ourselves a little. It can feel like everything you do is for your kids, and it’s easy to forget who you are outside of that. But here’s the truth: you’re still you. Being a mom doesn’t mean losing yourself—it just means you’re now balancing a new role with your old one. It’s about figuring out how to be both “mom” and “you” at the same time.

And you know what? That balance isn’t always easy, but it makes us grow in ways we didn’t expect. You find yourself discovering a new layer of strength, patience, and love—one that makes you realize you can handle more than you ever thought possible.

The Emotional Rollercoaster

Motherhood brings with it a wave of emotions. There are days filled with joy—like when your baby says their first word or learns to walk. Then, there are moments when you’re worried about everything, questioning whether you’re doing it right. But all these emotions are what make being a mom so powerful. The love you feel is deeper than you ever thought you could experience, and it’s all-consuming at times. And with that love comes a protective instinct you can’t quite explain, but it’s real.

That emotional rollercoaster is exhausting, but it’s also what makes motherhood so meaningful. You learn so much about yourself and your capacity to love, give, and grow.

The Unspoken Bond

There’s something about the bond between a mother and child that’s hard to describe—it’s just different. From the first time you hold your baby, you realize that there’s a connection beyond words. You start to recognize their needs even before they can speak. And in return, your child gives you a love that feels unbreakable.

That bond doesn’t just affect your relationship with your child—it shapes the way you see the world. You become more present, more patient, and more tuned in to the people around you. It’s one of the most profound changes that come with motherhood.

In the End, Motherhood Changes Us for the Better

Motherhood is challenging, but it’s also one of the most rewarding journeys you’ll ever go on. It teaches you to be strong in ways you didn’t know you could be and opens your heart to a love deeper than you’ve ever experienced. And in all of this, you’re not just a mom—you’re a stronger, more compassionate, and more powerful version of yourself.

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Shubha Shashidhar published in Blogs

Teenage friendship and Redflags

“If you see the red flag flutter too many times it’s time to uproot the flag” A friendship is meant to make you feel secure and strong.
Pre teens and during teens kids invest in friendship emotionally.

During teens when at times the world comes crushing down its the friendly banter with a friend which often
helps teenagers tide the troubles.

“A friend in need is a friend indeed” ..a most common quote ,yet no other quote defines friendship better.A friend can do, what no one else can do during stressful teenage  times or as a matter fact during any phase of life.
,
A friendship forged during teen times in school or early college years stays permanently all through life.

However as teens one can be overly dependent on ones friends.This can lead to clingy behaviour, giving in to the unreasonable demands of friend and relying excessively on the validation of friends.This eventually leads to irritation and depleted sense of self worth.
As teens our kids should be able to decode red flags in a friendship and if more than three to four checkpoints are ticked , they must face the bitter truth and move out of a such a friendship.
Let’s decode few prominent redflags..once decoded…
Uproot the flags  and move away from such a friendship
1)When friends  often cross your boundaries and cross limits of decency.
2)When  they bully you and tease you knowing well that it hurts you immensely.
3) When they break your trust and spread and share your inner most feelings and heartfelt secrets with others without remorse .
3)When they mock you incessantly infront of new friends and lesser known people, making you feel small and uncomfortable.
4)When their needs are always on top of your needs, a sure shot red flag .
5)When excessive money borrowing takes place without any sense of gratitude and subsequent non  return of money, kindly spot the red flag.
6)When the teenger ‘s self worth is undermined repeatedly andhe/she  feels ashamed of one’s  self ,just drop the friend.

There are number of many such red flags which teens need to keep an eye on before forging into any friendship or even while having a strong bond .

One way to tackle these redflags is to put across relevant points with force  and make the other person understand how one feels and why one feels betrayed.
The second way is to gracefully exit from such a bond because such a  friend is not worth your time and effort.
Generally teens look for sense of belonging and camaraderie in friendship.Hence , when they feel that a friend is traumatizing them they feel  a sense of betrayal .

A teenage boy/girl is already facing and undergoing tremendous amount of harmonal activities and bodily changes . During this stressful time they look for succour from their friends. When during such tough times they face red flagged friendships they are left baffled and heartbroken.
As a parent we can contribute positively and connect with our child during  only if we are mindful and are present to listen to the child without judgements and verdicts .
The teenger should feel no matter what happens with  friends  parents will stand by him and will not betray him /her ever.
This sense of trust will help the child navigate a difficult friendship and sense of losss.
As parent we must slowly start preparing our kids from mid school level for such situations and fallout  in life.
We must keep talking about the importance of self worth and self reflection.
Remain connected with your child to spot the red flags .
Patience and positive out look will help us  help our children.
Even if we are colour blind we can spot the red flag …We need to feel it.
Let’s teach this art to our  children.

 

 

 

 

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ArwaAbbas Sunelwala published in Blogs

Difference between feelings and behaviour.

*Question from a Parent – My child is very Emotionally Sensitive, how do I deal with him?*

*Smart Positive Parenting*

At any age, crying is a normal response to being overwhelmed by strong feelings, like anger, fear, stress or even happiness. Some children, however, cry more than others.

Those same children may get angry more often, may feel frustrated faster, and may get overly excited compared to their peers too. While there’s certainly nothing wrong with an overly emotional child, it can make life a little bit more difficult for them.

Sometimes parents are embarrassed by overly emotional kids. Help your child to have a Healthy Relationship with their Emotions. Don’t confuse Emotions for Weakness.

*Explain the difference between Feelings and Behaviours*

It’s important for you and your children to learn how to express emotions in a socially appropriate manner.

Screaming loudly in the middle of the street or throwing a temper tantrum at home or school isn’t OK.

Tell your child that he can feel any emotion he wants—and it’s OK to feel really angry or really scared or sad.

But, make it clear that he has choices in how he responds to those uncomfortable feelings.

So even though he feels angry, it’s not OK to hit.

Or just because he feels sad, doesn’t mean he can roll around on the floor cry.

When you talk to your child about emotions also show them the emoticons and ask them to label it. In that way they can learn more about emotions and how to express it appropriately.

Smile and Spread the Smiles with be_smartparents.

From Arwa Sunelwala

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Preeti Vohra published in Articles, Blogs

The Hidden Cost of Constant Scolding: What It Does to a Child’s Brain

A recent news report about a teenager leaving home due to excessive parental scolding for studies has raised an important question: What happens to a child’s brain when they are constantly criticized?

Neuroscience shows that frequent scolding activates the amygdala, the brain’s fear center, leading to heightened stress levels. Chronic stress can shrink the hippocampus, affecting memory and learning, while overactivating the prefrontal cortex, which regulates emotions. Studies reveal that children exposed to harsh parenting are at a higher risk of anxiety, depression, and self-esteem issues.

A 2023 study from Harvard University found that children who frequently experience verbal aggression from parents exhibit brain activity similar to those exposed to physical abuse. Another study by the American Psychological Association reported that 62% of children subjected to constant yelling struggle with emotional regulation in adulthood.

Constant criticism doesn’t just affect emotional well-being, it also impacts social skills. Children raised in high-stress environments may develop difficulties in forming healthy relationships and trusting others. Over time, these struggles can manifest in academic performance and professional settings, limiting their potential for success.

So, what’s the solution?

We need to work on providing healthy and congenial environment to the children for their proper all round development.

Reframe your words, replace criticism with constructive conversations. Instead of “Why can’t you ever listen?” try “Let’s figure this out together.” Creating a safe emotional space fosters trust, resilience, and stronger parent-child bonds.

It’s essential for parents to practice mindful communication. Using positive reinforcement, active listening, and emotional validation can significantly improve a child’s self-worth and confidence. Simple acts of empathy and patience can transform a child’s outlook on life and strengthen the parent-child connection.

Parenting is tough, but emotional safety is the foundation of a child’s well-being. Let’s break the cycle of fear-based parenting and build homes filled with understanding and support.

#Parenting #ChildDevelopment #MentalHealth #PositiveParenting

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S NILOFER RAHI published in Blogs

How to Handle Mom Guilt Without Feeling Overwhelmed.

Mom Guilt??

💭 “I should be doing more for my child.”
💭 “I shouldn’t have taken that break.”
💭 “Why did I lose my patience?”

Sound familiar? Mom guilt is real, and it’s exhausting. 😞 We constantly feel like we’re not doing enough, but here’s the truth:
Guilt doesn’t make you a bad mom—it means you care. ❀ Instead of letting it drain you, let’s reframe it into something positive.

👇 Here are 5 common mom guilt moments and how to shift your mindset:

✅ 1. Feeling like you’re not a “perfect mom”
📌 Guilt: You see other moms doing crafts & fun activities while your child is watching TV.
💡 Reframe It: Social media is a highlight reel. Your love and presence matter more than picture-perfect moments.

✅ 2. Yelling & losing patience
📌 Guilt: You snapped at your child and now feel terrible.
💡 Reframe It: Apologizing and showing emotional repair teaches your child valuable life skills.

✅ 3. Taking a break for yourself
📌 Guilt: You finally get a moment to rest, but guilt whispers, “You should be with your child.”
💡 Reframe It: A happy, rested mom is a better mom. Self-care isn’t selfish—it’s necessary.

✅ 4. Feeling like you didn’t do enough today
📌 Guilt: The day was chaotic, and you feel like you failed.
💡 Reframe It: The small moments—hugs, bedtime cuddles, a smile—are what truly count. 💛

✅ 5. Asking for help
📌 Guilt: You feel bad asking your partner or family for help.
💡 Reframe It: You don’t have to do it all alone. Strong moms ask for support.

✹ Let’s normalize letting go of mom guilt! If you’ve felt this way, you’re NOT alone. Drop a ❀ in the comments if this resonates!
📱 Which of these do you struggle with the most? Let’s chat in the comments! 👇

Happy Parenting !!!

#MomGuilt, #ParentingStruggles, #MotherhoodUnfiltered, #WorkingMomLife, #StayAtHomeMom, #MomLifeBalance, #ParentingJourney, #MomWellness, #SelfCareForMoms, #MindfulParenting, #EmotionalWellbeing, #MentalHealthForMoms, #ParentingCoach, #LifeCoachForMoms, #PersonalGrowth, #EmpoweredParenting, #RaisingHappyKids, #SNiloferRahi, #AmazingParentingNilofer, #amazingparenting

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Dr. Meena LM published in Blogs

Nature vs. Nurture: How Parenting Shapes the Development of a Child.

   ” The environment is not just something that acts on us, it’s something we actively engage with, shaping it and being shaped by it in return.” –  David Moore, 2017, Developmental Psychologist

Nature versus Nurture, an age-old debate has fascinated psychologists, educators, and parents alike. Nature refers to our genetic inheritance, the biological predispositions we receive from our parents. Nurture, on the other hand, encompasses all the environmental influences that impact us like upbringing, social interactions, education and cultural experiences. While nature provides the blueprint, nurture acts as the architect, shaping the final structure.

The question isn’t which matters more, but how we can embrace both to shape the best versions for our children.

Nature: The Blueprint Within
Nature is the set of genetic instructions encoded in our children’s DNA—their height, eye color, temperament, including predispositions for talents or challenges, even the susceptibility to certain diseases. Nature sets the stage, but it’s nurture that directs the play.

Nurture: The Environment We Create
If nature plants the seeds, nurture is the soil, sunlight, and water. Nurture is the Sculpting Hand. The love, the support the opportunities we give, the values we teach, the way we respond to their triumphs and tantrums. A nurturing environment can foster resilience, beliefs, behaviors, spark curiosity, and instill confidence.

Parenting: The Art of Balance
Parenting is not about choosing between nature and nurture but about harmonizing the two. Parents are the primary architects of their child’s environment, providing the love, care, and guidance that are essential for healthy development.

Here’s how parents can bridge the gap and unlock their child’s full potential

Create a nurturing environment: Provide a safe, loving, and stimulating environment where your child feels secure and supported. Resilience doesn’t come from a perfect life but built through challenges.

Provide opportunities for learning: Expose your child to a variety of experiences and learning opportunities that will help them grow and develop their innate abilities

Foster healthy relationships: Encourage positive social interactions and help your child develop strong, healthy relationships with others.

Be a role model: Children learn by observing the adults around them. Model kindness, patience, and perseverance and show them how to handle setbacks with grace.

                                                                                        : https://rhapsodyinwords.com/2015/10/15/thoughts-on-nature-vs-nurture/

The Power of Synergy:
Nature and nurture don’t compete—they collaborate and by recognizing by understanding the intricate interplay of both we as a parent have the incredible power to bridges the two, shaping our children by honoring their innate traits and nurturing their growth, creating a conducive environment for them where their unique potential can truly shine.

“Parenting isn’t about perfection; but the true art and joy of raising a child, it’s about guiding your child to become the best versions of themselves.”

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